What It’s Really Like to Work While Your Teen Is in Crisis
Your top performer just asked for Friday off. Again.
You think it's burnout. It might be their kid.
If you’ve been through this. You get it.
When my daughter Maddie was in crisis, if I worked at 20% capacity, that was a good day.
When we lost her to suicide, I'm lucky if my output was 5%. And it wasn't a good 5% either.
The Scale of the Problem
1 in 4 employee parents is dealing with a struggling teen right now.
That's 1 in 7 of your total workforce.
Most hide it. They confide in their manager, if anyone at all.
Otherwise, it gets buried.
And the work suffers alongside it. Drastically.
You're not seeing it because they're showing up. Perfect attendance. Sitting at their desks. Attending meetings.
But they're not really there.
What This Actually Looks Like
My day when Maddie was in crisis at the hospital:
8:00am - Arrive at office. Check phone 47 times before first meeting.
9:00am - Meeting. I'm physically present. Retain nothing.
10:00am - Stare at email. Read same sentence six times. Don't respond.
11:00am - Another meeting. Nod at appropriate times. No idea what was decided.
12:00pm - Maddie texts "I'm fine." Google searching “signs your teen is hiding depression.”
1:00pm - Attempt to work on client project. Manage two paragraphs in an hour.
2:00pm - Hospital calls. Leave for the day. Tell no one why.
Output for the day: Maybe 1 hour of actual work.
That's not 20% productivity loss. That's 87.5%.
And that was a good day.
After we lost Maddie:
8:00am - Arrive at desk. Stare at screen. See nothing.
10:00am - Someone asks a question. Have no idea what they said.
12:00pm - Realize I haven't moved in two hours.
2:00pm - Attempt work. Accomplish nothing.
4:00pm - Respond to three emails. All typos. Barely coherent.
5:00pm - Go home. Tomorrow will be the same.
Output for the day: 5% of normal.
This continued for a year, maybe 2 or 3. Those years bled into one another.
I ran my own business. There was no manager to cover for me. No team to pick up slack.
Just me. And a brain that had stopped functioning.
If brushing my teeth required a manual, I wouldn't have been able to write it.
That's not hyperbole. That's literal.
I'd open my laptop. Stare at invoices. Close it again.
I'd start an email. Forget what I was saying mid-sentence.
I'd have a client meeting. Nod. Agree to things. Have no memory of what was discussed.
My revenue dropped 60% in three months.
I missed invoices. Forgot meetings. Made decisions that made no sense.
I didn’t have a safety net.
I just quietly collapsed.
The Financial Math
We built a calculator to show you what this is actually costing your organization.
Well, as accurate as we could best estimate based on reports from Deloitte, Harvard Business Review and several other credible sources.
If only presenteeism was consistent from person to person. It's not.
Our very conservative numbers will scare the crap out of you.
If you’ve ever been through this personally. You’ll understand.
If you know someone who’s been through it, ask them what their brain was like during that time of crisis.
Try the ROI Calculator It’s really good fiction, but will give you an indication.
Read this article, for a deeper dive into this.
The Reality Behind the Numbers
Our calculator assumes 20% productivity loss.
That's conservative.
Here's what the research actually shows:
Employees in family crisis: 20-40% productivity loss
Employees whose child is suicidal: 50-80% productivity loss
Employees who've lost a child: 80-95% productivity loss for 12-24 months
We went with 20% because anything higher sounds unbelievable. Unless you’ve lived through this yourself.
But I lived it.
When Maddie was in crisis, I worked at maybe 20% capacity. On a good day.
When we lost her, I was at 5% for a year, probably much longer.
Your employees are living it right now.
You just don't know it yet.
Why They Don't Tell You
They confide in their manager. If anyone at all.
Otherwise, it gets buried.
Why the silence?
They're protecting their job.
Admitting your kid is suicidal feels like admitting you're unreliable. Unstable. A liability. A bad parent
They're protecting their kid's privacy.
Maddie didn't want anyone to know. I honoured that. Even when it meant suffering in silence.
They think they're the only one.
Every parent believes their situation is unique. That no one else could possibly understand.
There's no clear path to support.
Your employee handbook says "mental health resources available through EAP." But EAP is for them, not their struggling teen. They don't know where to turn.
Stigma is real.
Mental health. Teen mental health. Suicide. Easier to say "stomach issues" than "psych ward."
So they bury it.
They show up. They smile. They say "I'm fine."
And their work crumbles around them.
Until they quit, go on disability, or get fired.
What It Costs When They Collapse
Let's do the actual math on one employee:
Employee in crisis (operating at 50% for 12 months):
Salary: $120,000/year
Actual output: ~$60,000 worth of work
Lost productivity: $60,000
Manager covering for them:
Time spent: ~10 hours/week × 52 weeks = 520 hours
Manager's hourly rate: ~$75/hour
Manager cost: $39,000
Team picking up slack:
Collective burnout
One team members eventually quit
Replacement costs: $90,000
Total cost of ONE employee in crisis: $189,000
I couldn’t quit. Some people will quit.
The Business Owner Reality
When you're a business owner and your kid is in crisis, there's no safety net.
No manager covering. No team absorbing projects. No HR support.
Just you. And a brain that stopped functioning.
Here's what happened to my business:
Month 1-3 (Maddie in crisis):
Revenue dropped 20%
Missed deadlines I'd never missed before
Client complaints started
Quality declined noticeably
Month 4-6 (After we lost Maddie):
Revenue dropped another 40% (60% total decline)
Forgot to invoice clients for months
Lost tens of thousands in revenue
Made decisions that made no sense, had to undo them later
Couldn't write coherent emails; clients noticed
Credit took a hit from missed bills. Or unable to pay them.
Subsidized living through savings, incurring debt
They just quietly collapse.
And you never see it coming because they don't tell you.
They're your contractors. Your consultants. Your vendors.
One day they're reliable. The next, they're not responding. Projects are late. Quality drops.
You think they're flaking. Getting lazy. Losing their edge.
Their kid is dying. Or already dead.
And their brain stopped working.
What Actually Helps
Here's what we've built because nothing like this existed when I needed it:
Lifeline Parent Workshops
Three 60-minute sessions teaching employee parents:
How to recognize warning signs before crisis
How to have hard conversations without shutting teens down
Where to access resources help fast
Delivered to your entire employee parent population.
Not just the ones brave enough to raise their hand.
Everyone gets the tools before they need them. Or finally gets them while they need it most.
Should you be worried about your child? Take our parent awareness check called Teen Signal Check.
When Something Feels Off Parent Support Group
Ongoing community support for employee parents:
Monthly workshops and training
Peer support from parents who get it
Resources, practical workshops, coaching and tools
No shame. No judgment.
Prevents the isolation that makes everything worse.
When you're the only one carrying the weight, you minimize it. You wait. You hope it passes.
In community, you act sooner. Check it out HERE.
Expedited Referral Network
Fast access to vetted mental health professionals:
Days or weeks, not months
Matched to specific needs
Supports both crisis and pre-crisis
Prevents escalation
The typical wait for teen therapy is 3-6 months.
Most families don't have 6 months.
We get them help in days. More info HERE.
The Math That Actually Matters
Scenario 1: Do Nothing (Status Quo)
Employee struggles in silence at 20% capacity for 6 months
Manager spends 10 hours/week managing around it, burns out
Employee eventually quits
Manager quits 6 months later from burnout
Cost per affected employee: $10,000/month
Multiply that by the number of affected employees in your organization.
Scenario 2: MentorWell Solution
Lifeline Parent Workshops: $5/parent/month
When Something Feels Off: $10/parent/month
Expedited Referral: $5/parent/month **
** Depends on size of company
Total investment per employee: $20/parent/month
Results:
Employee gets help early, maintains 80-90% productivity
Manager doesn't burn out
Both stay with company
Crisis prevented before escalation
What Happens Next?
You've seen the numbers.
You know this is happening in your organization.
Now what?
Option 1: Do nothing.
Hope it's not as bad as the calculator says.
Watch turnover continue.
Wonder why your best people keep leaving.
Lose another $500,000+ this year to a problem you're not addressing.
Option 2: Build something yourself.
Spend 12-18 months figuring out mental health support.
Hire consultants. Train HR. Hope you get it right.
Watch your best employees quit while you're still planning.
Option 3: Implement a proven solution.
MentorWell has already done the work.
This is built by lived experience, and supported by science and research. We know what works.
We can have your program running in under 30 days.
Here's What Implementation Looks Like:
Week 1-2: Assessment
We talk to your HR team, identify needs.
Week 4: Lifeline Rollout
First cohort of employee parents goes through workshops.
Ongoing: Support
When Something Feels Off community launches for your organization.
Expedited Referral available for families who need it.
Pricing That Makes Sense
We price based on employee count, not per-participant.
Why?
Because we want every parent in your organization to have access.
Not just the ones who sign up first.
Typical Investment:
Small organization (50-200 employees):
$15,000-$30,000/year
Mid-size (200-1,000 employees):
$30,000-$120,000/year
Enterprise (1,000+ employees):
Custom pricing
Compare that to the calculator results above.
The program pays for itself if it:
Prevents ONE senior employee from quitting
Recovers productivity for THREE affected parents
Saves your managers FIVE hours/week of emotional labour
Most organizations see ROI within 3-6 months.
Let’s have a no obligation 30 minute call
Let's Talk About What This Looks Like for Your Organization
No pitch. No pressure.
Just a 30-minute conversation about:
What you're seeing in your workforce
What we've seen work (and not work)
Whether MentorWell makes sense for you
Schedule 30-Minute Demo Call
Or Start With the ROI Calculator
Not ready for a call? Check out your exposure, you likely have no visibility to right now
Then decide if it's right for your organization.
Try our ROI Calculator
The Truth You Already Know
The employees showing up every day while their kid is in crisis?
They're heroes.
But they shouldn't have to be.
Give them the support they need.
Before they quit.
Before their kid's crisis becomes your turnover problem.
Before their brain stops working and you lose them completely.
Because here's what I learned:
When you're in crisis, your brain stops working.
You can't remember anything. You can't make decisions. You can't pay your bills.
The pressure becomes compounded. The productivity loss becomes greater. Their team and manager gets impacted. Your benefit costs rise.
Your employees are living this right now.
They're just not telling you.
Don't wait until they're gone to wish you'd acted sooner.
