From Struggling Student to CEO: Why the Path Isn’t Always by Straight A’s

Grades measure recall. EQ measures reality.

Straight A’s look impressive.
They make adults smile.
Parents’ fears naively disappear

Life shows us something different.

The teens who thrive long term are not only the ones who ace tests. They are the ones who know themselves, can calm their nervous system, can read a room, can repair a relationship after a tough moment. They ask for help. They listen. They care. That is emotional intelligence. That is EQ. And it carries farther than any transcript.

What EQ really is

EQ is not a trend. It is how we live with ourselves and with other people.

• Self awareness

• Self regulation

• Empathy

• Clear communication

• Boundaries

• Conflict repair

• Resilience after setbacks

You can measure IQ with a score. EQ shows up in daily choices. It shapes trust. It shapes leadership. It shapes mental health.

What schools teach, and what they miss

Schools teach content. Algebra. Grammar. Chemistry. Useful, yes.
But life also demands skills that rarely get graded.

• Naming what you feel

• Pausing before you react

• Owning a mistake

• Making amends with a friend or family member

• Working through discomfort

• Holding space for someone who is struggling

No one prints that on a report card. Yet employers ask for it. Partners rely on it. Friends remember it.

The big flaw in our education system

We do not teach emotional intelligence in any real, consistent way. We grade memorization. We rank students by speed and recall. We tell them their future is a number on a page. Then we send them into workplaces where the real currency is people.

EQ is what builds leaders.
EQ negotiates winning mergers and acquisitions.
EQ builds powerful and impactful teams.
EQ creates cultures that support and lift people to be their best selves.
These are the cultures customers love and employees love, because people feel valued, and it shows.

Imagine a class where students learn to apologise, to repair after conflict, to ask for what they need, to give feedback without harm. Imagine if those skills counted as much as calculus. We would graduate kinder citizens and stronger leaders. We would prevent a lot of pain.

Why we place more weight on EQ

Because EQ:

• Protects mental health.
  When you can name and manage feelings, you lower anxiety and shame. You bounce back faster and improve resilience.

• Improves learning.
  Calm minds learn better. Curiosity stays open when the fear settles.

• Builds strong teams.
  People follow leaders who listen, who share credit, who repair quickly after conflict. Respect doesn’t come from a title.

• Outlasts grades.
  A letter fades. Character compounds.

If your child is not bringing home top marks

Please breathe.
Look at who they are with people. As people.
Do they notice others. Do they show kindness. Do they keep trying. Do they apologize when it matters. If yes, I would bet on them.

Marks can improve with the right support. EQ can grow as well, and it will serve them in every season of life.

What we practise at The MentorWell

We help teens and young adults build emotional strength in simple, human ways.

• Check in with feelings using plain language

• Short breathing resets to settle the body

• Name triggers and plan for hard moments

• Practise tough conversations in a safe space

• Learn to set boundaries without anger

• Turn mistakes into lessons, not labels

• Celebrate daily wins so progress is visible

We also bring parents into the process when it helps. Not to judge. To support.

Learn more at thementorwell.com.

Try this at home

Keep it practical. Keep it kind.

• At dinner, ask: What was one win today? What felt hard? Who helped you? and who did you help?

• Before bed, write one small win. Then write one likely win for tomorrow.

• After a tough moment, try this repair script:” I am sorry for my part. Here is what I learned. Here is how I will handle it next time.”

• When your child is upset, try: “I am here. ““Tell me more.”” What do you need from me right now.”

And most importantly, shut up and listen. Resist the urge to jump in and fix. I know it’s hard!

None of this requires a perfect family or more hours in the day. It asks for presence. It asks for patience. Some days will be messy. That is fine. Messy is where growth lives.

A personal note

I have worked with students who hid their report cards like secrets. I’m pretty sure my kids did the same. And I did the same thing to my parents.

I have also met young people who light up a room, who hold space for friends, who show courage when no one is watching. The world needs both knowledge and heart. Knowing what I know now, I would place more value on success through EQ than through any line of grades.

The heart of The MentorWell

We value curiosity over ego.
We value character over image.
We value steady progress over perfect outcomes.

IQ can open a door. EQ keeps it open, because people want to walk through it with you.

If this resonates, start small today. Ask one better question. Offer one honest apology. Notice one quiet win. That is how EQ grows. That is how confidence grows. And that is why The MentorWell will always value EQ over IQ.

The parts we need to sculpt

We need to see every child as a piece of raw clay. Different parts need sculpting at different stages of life. But why do we wait?

• Values: mostly shaped at home, by parents, faith, culture, and the circles we keep.

• Mind: school is the primary contributor to intellect and knowledge. We continually learn throughout through practical applications as business owners, employees, parents and friends

• Character: the piece that often matters most. It starts with understanding our emotions.

We are not taught emotional intelligence in school. Not in any real or consistent way. We absorb it through daily interactions. Family dinners. Friendships. Tough conversations. Repair after mistakes.

Imagine if your teen learned this before twenty. Self awareness. Self regulation. Empathy. Conflict resolution. Clear communication. I know adults my age who could use a remedial class in EQ. No shame in that. Life moves fast. Feelings do not come with an instruction manual.

Now, think if your kids learned elements of EQ as they’re going through their most impressionable years. They’re called “the teenage years” for a reason.

Which of these would you leave to chance. Values? Mind? Character?
None of them. Yet that is what is happening when we pretend a report card tells the whole story.

This is why we place more weight on EQ at The MentorWell. It builds leaders. It negotiates fair deals. It grows teams that care for one another. It creates workplaces that lift people to their best. Customers feel it. Employees feel it. Because people are valued, and it shows.